Weekly Musings

Here we go, here we go...

Vacation: 
Do it, and do it a lot, before you have kids.  Once you have them, it will never be the same.  Here's why. You have two options:


1) Take your kids WITH you.  With this option, you'll certainly have fun.  It's likely though, that your fun will mostly have to do with watching your KIDS have fun, seeing things through their eyes, creating memories with them, etc.  It will likely NOT have a lot to do with relaxing, lounging, refreshing.  So..like I said...not the same as what you were accustomed to before kids.


2) Go WITHOUT your kids....and miss them like crazy the whole time.  Nason and I are about to leave next week for Florida, and I am so excited, but I am already feeling a little sad and bluesy and bummed at the idea of leaving my little man behind.  I really hate it. Four nights is a lot, in my opinion (although I HAVE done it once before, and I will definitely say that the sadness of saying goodbye began to dissipate about 5 minutes after leaving him.  I missed him of course, but give me a pool, a poolside beverage, a comfy hotel bed, and four mornings of sleeping late, and you better believe I fared just fine).  It's going to be a blast, and I can't wait, but I feel pretty sure that four nights is my max.  And to think I briefly considered going to Europe with my mom for 10 days!

I Have a New "Issue":
As I frequently mention on this blog, I struggle a fair amount with worry/anxiety.  It's definitely my "issue".  I'm constantly working on/struggling through/focused on/trying to overcome my worry issue.  However, I've become aware recently that I have another "issue" that deserves some attention too.  


In a bible study I'm in right now, we're discussing what it is that we each individually base our sense of identity on (find our value in).  By the way, as a Christian, our identity and value should be embedded in Christ....who HE says we are.  But let's get real....that's hard to do, and especially hard I think for women.  


Anyway, I've concluded that my identity is severely misplaced.  And.....just this very second I realized that my explanation for what I mean exactly would be much too long for this post, and warrants a post of it's own.  So if you're reading this, and if you care to find out more about what I mean, stay tuned for a blog post dedicated solely to that.  


I'm Moving On:
It's time for me to have some closure. 


 I was in a happy, loving, and committed relationship with All My Children for a lot of years.  We grew up together, and fell in love when I was only 15.  We experienced 16 years of life together.  I loved my AMC deeply for those 16 years, and I never strayed once.  AMC was my ONLY true soap love.  I was completely faithful to it, for all those years.  A one soap kind of woman.  I will never get over it. It will never be replaced in my heart. I have to face the facts though, and the reality is, it left me. 


For months, I refused to date any other soap.  None could ever compare to the one I had lost.  However, a new soap has caught my eye.  


I'm not saying I've fallen in love again.I'm not seeing it seriously.  I'm  definitely not saying I'm ready to be in a committed relationship with it.  I'm just saying, I'm intrigued.  I  have a small "crush" on it, if you will.  It has some long-term relationship POTENTIAL.    


Days of Our Lives, you've got some really big shoes to fill, but I'm willing to give you a chance.  Don't let me down.  


Coffee and Sushi:
You know how there's Hard-Core  Coffee people?  Like, they have to have their coffee the second they wake up in the morning, and if they don't, they can neither speak nor process information, nor function in general?


You know how there's Hard-Core Sushi people, and they always talk about NEEDING sushi, CRAVING sushi, having to "go for sushi" or else they're going to die?  


Well, I never thought I could EVER be either of those people, but as it turns out, I'm for sure a Hard-Core Coffee person, and well on my way to being a Hard-Core Sushi person.  


This is bad-timing to start morphing into that kind of person.  When/if I ever get pregnant again, I'm not going to be able to have either of those things.  That puts a little bit of fear into my heart, I have to say.  I can't imagine a coffee-less morning, and although I can still imagine a sushi-less week, more and more I'm finding myself daydreaming about it, and feeling like I must have it.  


Oh one more...


You know how there's Hard-Core Can't Fly On An Airplane Without Being Heavily Drugged or Medicated Because Their Fear of Flying Is So Severe People?  Like, they have crazy-person mental and emotional breakdowns on planes if they're NOT drugged or medicated (but for the record, they're perfectly sane and composed if they ARE heavily medicated)?  Oh, you don't know a person like that?  Well, fly with me sometime, and you can say you've met one.  I fly next week.  I don't fly without taking a Valium (obtained through my network of dealers. Ha ha), and drinking a glass of wine.  On the off-chance that I'm pregnant this month, I don't feel good about doing that next week.  So that means that I, Nason, and everyone else aboard our Southwest Airlines flight from Austin to Baltimore to Fort Lauderdale is SCREWED with a capital "S".  


Ok.  That's all I got for now!  Look for me on the 6:00 news next week.  I'll be the crazy lady that grounded a plane, and had to be physically restrained, because I was unable to compose myself.  It'll be great.